


Big Mood, Honestly

by pine_ster



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Bill being an idiot, Bill is a mess, How Do I Tag, I Don't Even Know, Why Did I Write This?, Will is Confused
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-23
Updated: 2018-05-23
Packaged: 2019-05-13 01:01:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14739143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pine_ster/pseuds/pine_ster
Summary: Absolute fucking bullshit. Bill thought preparing himself for his hopefully painless death.He was never going on a morning stroll again, ever.





	Big Mood, Honestly

**Author's Note:**

> You can just skip over the first bit of writing, I started this out as a fantasy story were Bill's a prince, but two years later and I just want him to be a dragon hunter that bit of a bit more than he can chew.

The branches of the evergreen trees danced in the wind, swinging left and right to an inaudible sound, showing of their deep green needles to the wildlife above and underneath them. Amongst the trees walked a man with a mop of golden hair on his head. Tall and lanky legs carried him through the forest`s underbrush with easy as he followed a creature similar to a rabbit, though evidently not one judging from its tall build and two additional legs.

Hopping to a small clearing the creature went to a boulder, sniffed it and continued to promptly run away as if spooked. Sky blue eyes looked around the surrounding area to check for anything. The blue eyed blond sight in relieve as there didn`t seem to be any danger nearby.

Coming out from under the bush he was hiding in he walked onto the sunlit clearing. It really wasn`t anything special or big for that matter. There was only a large boulder, a few patches of grass, ferns and needle covered ground where the pine trees branches reached.

The blond ran a hand through his hair to make sure non` of the bush`s leaves were caught in it. He sat down in front of the boulder and leaning on it. It was warm, presumably from the early summer sun shining on it giving it a strange blue green shine. His hand ran over it, its surface was smooth and warm like that of the pet snake he once owned, he scratched his cheek, that was an odd comparison.

He didn`t know what but something was off with the boulder. He turned his head to his left to see its surface reflecting the sunrays like a mirror. It held an almost scale like pattern… scale like pattern… A puff of hot air blew on his neck followed by a grunt that made the blue eyed man`s heart skip a beat at the sudden thought that, this most likely wasn`t a boulder flew into his mind. He slowly, very slowly turned his head only to come face to snout with something that was most definitely big enough to eat him.

A dragon, his mind unhelpfully supplied.

“Hey there big guy. Or are you a girl? In that case, how yah doin’ beautiful.” The man tried to talk to the dragon.

”My name`s Bill, Bill Cipher, what about you, got a name?” The dragon rolled on its paws and stood up of the ground shaking its self to get rid of the needles that stuck to its being. Now on its feet the dragon looked even taller, though surprisingly more slim than the average bulky and intimidating dragon, a runt maybe.

“So how about you don`t eat or kill me and in exchange I`ll leave you be. Forget this ever happened, eh?”

Though it wasn`t as big as the dragons he had seen and the one he had killed before, it was still very massive. The dragon yawned and stretched giving Bill a gimps of razor sharp canines that could rip through armor like a hot knife through butter, claws that looked strong enough to cut through diamonds and wings Bill was sure were not made out of the usually elastic fragile sheen of skin, which was odd, but out of a leathery and strong looking material.

Looking up at the dragon that towered before him, Bill cursed his younger brother for convincing him to go into the forest today and his bad luck for deciding that leaving all of his weapons except for a god damn dagger that will do him absolutely no good in a fight against a dragon, was a good idea.

The dragon looked at Bill through tired eyes, a glint of something in them that made Bill stop for a moment before realizing that that glint could very well be the knowledge that it just got breakfast in bed.

Bill took put his hands in front of him as to show he means no harm and slowly backed away from the dragon. The dragon swiftly put its tail behind Bill as if to say: “You ain`t goin` nowhere, bud.”

Realizing that there was no way the currently still semi non-hostile dragon was going to let him leave, he slowly began to reach to his belt where his dagger was. The dragon`s eyes narrow and its pupils turned into slits. It gave a warning growl and Bill knew he was screwed, this dragon seemed somewhat smarter than the average mountain lizard.

“So, nice weather we’re having.” Said Bill, the dragon seemed unimpressed.

He was genuinely confused by the dragon`s behavior. It wasn`t uncommon for some dragons to play with their victims but those were mostly Panzer class dragons who live in a warmer climate and mostly near mountains.

While this dragon does have some of the Panzer class usual traits it was far too small and thin and its wings far too small reminding Bill more of the Storm class. The smaller the wings the faster and more agile the dragon.

Bill still hasn’t stopped subtly reaching towards his dagger which seemed to displease the dragon immensely, his brother has always said that subtlety isn’t his strong suit. As a small drops of, what Bill assumed was acid, dripped out of its mouth he knew he was dead.

Again Bill had to reanalyze his opponent. Neither Storm nor Panzer class dragons possessed acid. Only Toxic class dragons possessed either acid breath or could sting someone with a part of their body very similar to scorpions or snakes.

It could be a mixed breed, though very unlikely, mixed breeding between different class types isn’t something that can happen since the environments in which each class live are so different that they rarely even cross paths, as well as the fact that they have very different food sources, even if a mixed offspring were to hatch it would die of starvation or the climate.

Baffled by the dragon he did not paying attention to the surrounding area, the blond was startled out of his thoughts by an ear splitting screech. Momentarily forgetting the threat in front of him he spun around to look at the general direction of the screech.

“Please don’t be a banshee, please don’t be a banshee, please don’t be a banshee, please don’t be a b-“ The dragon gave a silent growl at Bill’s silent mumbling, which also served to make him aware of the 15 something feet tall dragon more or less curled around him.

Stumbling out of the tree line is a 10 feet-something tall stone giant, which, what? No, Bill called bullshit on that one, there was no fucking way a stone giant could just be walking around the very much stone-less forest somewhat far away from any mountain and by chance just stumble upon Bill and The Dragon. Walking out after it was not one, but two banshees, the universe hated him.

  _Absolute fucking bullshit_. Bill thought preparing himself for his hopefully painless death.

At this point he was just done with today so obviously this was the perfect moment for the dragon to tackle the giant resulting in it toppling over before jumping of off it spreading its wings grabbing Bill in its claws and flying off.

 

At that moment two thoughts raised through Bill`s head. The first was the realization that, if he wasn`t dead before than he sure as all fucking hell was now. The second thought was that if he did survive this encounter he would throw his brother in a pool of meat sauce, tie a steak around his neck and gift him to a flock of Geckobacks so they can peck him apart bit by bit.

But, he reasoned, there was no way he was going to survive this anyway so haunting him beyond the grave will have to do.

Apparently The Dragon had other plans as it leisurely flew over the tree tops, seemingly enjoying his afternoon flight above the forest only to land in a clearing with a wooden cottage stationed in the middle.

Bill stared silent possibly in shock as The Dragon carried him to his door step in one of its claws, set back on its haunches, lightly taped three times against the door and waited.

The door opened and a cheerful bluenet called out a hello before stopping.

He looked up, and up, and up to where The Dragons head looked down at him.

“Hey, bro.” Bill greeted his brother.

“Eeeeeeh…” Will said eloquently, eyes not straying from The Dragon’s.

Bill dropped to the forest floor, The Dragon deciding that he had done his part and just upturned his claws and let him fall the short distance to the ground. It turned around casual as is before flying off to god knows where.  

“Wh- Whaaa?” Will asked his brother. Bill only grunted and lifted his head of the ground slightly.

“Such a big mood.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for getting to this point, if you read the story and liked it consider leaving kudos and/or a comment entailing how bad my writing is. 
> 
> -Pine


End file.
